no promises

Everytime i feel close, i was actually quite faraway.
Everytime i feel that i'm inside, i'm actually still a distance away from you.

I was listening to this song, 'no promises' by Shayne Ward and it find it very meaningful.
Notice the lyrics and I see my own reflecion while listening to this song.
There may be many interpretion for this song, but i'll take it this way:


I am very confused now and i'm feeling pretty unstable but the only thing i want now is to be with you and hold you tight and don't wanna let go of you. I know that i'm happy when we are together doing things that we love, i felt like heaven, without worries and boundaries but this feeling doesn't last forever because i sense a distance in between us when we're not together. Even though that i love you, but i can't be sure for whats going to happen in the future and thus, No Promises... just my reflection of insecurity and fear, which explains why 'I just want to die in your arms', because this will stop the time so i can be with you forever without anything obstructing or changing this beautiful moment.

Lol its a very cool song...
But its just a song~


i xxxx you

lameness

how lame can a person be...

how lame can 2 person be...

how lame can 2 person be at the same time...

thats why we're sisters!!

feeling weak

I feel that fitness is no longer part of my life.

Sigh, this suck.

Yo check this out

I didnt know the condom brand 'Ansell' manufacture other rubber products other than condoms. I know a popular term condom makers like to use: 'enhanced pleasure'. Since they have the technology to make you feel so comfortable, i recommend that you guys use this rubber glove brand :) should feel the enhanced pleasure as well. Aheem i wonder if Durex have rubber gloves too

helpless

I really wanna share this with anyone, literally ANYONE but i know i cant and i dont feel comfortable telling out though. If u understand what i'm trying to say...

It may be embarrassing to say but i've never felt this way for a long time and i think i've forgotten how it feels like to be pain. However this is a little different... i never in my life gotten myself into the pair of shoes i'm wearing now. I dont feel comfortable wearing it cos of certain reasons but i just like wearing it. Its just an ordinary decent pair of shoes but i have this very special feeling when i wear it. I dont know why was i feeling that way or was i wrong having that kind of feeling and i questioned myself many many times whether or not i should walk my life barefooted. I was wondering why are all these things in my mind. Well, i've now got my answer. Thats love.

Now that its torn, I am torn. I know its not okay, I'm not okay as well. I really wanna know whats going on but i have the feeling i'm just not the one. I feel like i'm not in the right position to ask her why. Am i the right one to repair it. I feel so helpless, whateva the problems, i just want her to be happy, then i'm good already.

Currently listening to All good things (come to an end) and wondering whether its true. everytime i feel close to it, i'm actually still faraway... What can i do to get closer?

Something worth remembering

I miss you

i pity this blog la... only get to be updated when i'm not in the mood. I have a major assignment due in 2 days and i cant believe i'm right here writing this shit now. Sigh wtf am i doing!



Its a long story but i cant believe that i'll bring myself into this stage of life where things are so damn complicated. When i see people getting themselves into what i'm in now, i'll just wish them all the best and stay alive. I cant believe i'm the fucked up one now.

I heard people talk about cherishing every moment you have with someone you love and dont worry about eternity. Screw them... i wonder whether they know what kind of shit they're talking about. Only losers talk like that okay... If u cannot get someone to be your gf, course u say that to make yourself feel better la. And you call that true love... Of cos thats true love la only in dramas cos no matter what the director will eventually make something happen at last and make you drop some tears. Then you'll think 'Fuiyoo so damn romantic'.

I really dont give a shit...

I dont give a shit in what i'm into now. But how can u leave this shit hanging and get on with it for the rest of your life. Sometimes i feel very lucky, i really do... How i hope its just the both of us involved... If i am given a chance to travel time, i'll definitely get back to 2007. I know i'll be able to make a difference...

I am happy, i really am... But there is always a price to pay and i think i'm paying a little more than the normal price. I wonder whether its worth paying, worth being this happy and then getting more hurt in the future. Ask me this question i'll answer you i really dont GIVE A SHIT, SCREW it fuck it... i love her.

Usually i wont b feeling this way but sometimes it just forces me to think whether i've made the right choice. No matter what the fuck, i never regret.

I really hope we can fix this shit... I'm really really tired of it already.

ryn wong miss me

i miss ryn wong

x)